Polyamory in South Africa: Embracing Relationships Beyond Three

A new trend seems to be on the rise among young South Africans – polyamory, involving romantic relationships with multiple partners simultaneously.

Lethabo Mojalefa, a bisexual woman, and Fletcher Mojalefa, a straight man, engaged in a relationship in December 2018 as reported by My Joy Online. Early on, they recognised the importance of meeting each other’s emotional and sexual needs, which led them to explore a relatively unconventional idea – bringing a third person into their relationship.

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In August of the following year, they met Lunya Makua, also a bisexual woman, who became the third member of their relationship. Despite living in rural South Africa, they faced challenges due to societal misconceptions, with some peers confusing polyamory with polygamy.

They’ve faced criticism, but Lethabo remains unbothered, explaining that she’s aware of her decisions and not swayed by judgment. While polyamory is gaining popularity, the trio acknowledges that everyone in their community might not understand it well.

Polyamorous relationships are becoming more common in South Africa, and despite some disapproval, groups are organising events in major cities to connect like-minded individuals. Interestingly, polyamory is not limited to younger generations, as it also attracts individuals from older age groups seeking more flexibility in relationships.

Regarding their child, Lethabo and Lunya actively raise him, and they believe he will grow up understanding their family dynamic. The trio is open to adding a fourth person to their relationship, but they emphasise the importance of everyone’s consent.

Fletcher, being the only man in the relationship, values the harmony between the women and fully supports their connection. If Lethabo were to enter another relationship with a man, Fletcher says he would respect her decision.

Overall, polyamory offers these individuals a unique and egalitarian relationship style that challenges traditional norms and fosters open communication.

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Photo: Facebook / @BBC News Africa